The Fear Of Being Judged

No one likes to be judged, but ironically we judge others as often as we blink our eyes. Whether it is a celebrity or the girl next door, everyone is judged to various degrees either consciously or unconsciously. Though being judgmental does not necessarily have to be negative, meeting new people or analyzing situations without having preconceived notions can be a challenge in itself. An art, I’m still trying to learn. Though exceptions exist, our society is rather built on a lot of such generalizations that have now become social norms, some assist us while some restrict.

Does having an intellectual job really define a person’s caliber or does wearing a short skirt really make a girl easy? I don’t think so. It’s a personal choice, not everyone loves chocolates and not everyone is afraid of the dark. If we can accept such differences then why do we generalize on the others? Why do we all walk faster while crossing a built man with tattoos and why is a girl walking alone always tried on?

It’s a free world isn’t it? Then why are there times when we reconsider our choices just because of what others might think of us. Now you could say that this is a sign of low self confidence but that’s not the case. You could be a very confident and determined person but just the thought of what the world might think of you can make anyone conscious. Not because your choices in life are wrong but because they are just different, out of the norm I guess.

What I’ve learned over time is that people that really matter will either not judge you or ask why before they create an opinion about you. They will accept you the way you are and be willing to understand your choices. On the other hand if they act like the rest of the world, then it’s your fault in the first place, you picked the wrong people to be close to you! I may sound harsh, but it’s true. People who love you, will always be there for you and if they walk out on you then aren’t you glad you know?

You may say “I don’t limit my opportunities; I do what I want to do”. But think again, do you really? Would you be doing exactly what you are today if you had just followed your heart? If so, then lucky you, I hope to get there someday. If not, then revisit your heart’s desires, maybe you couldn’t do it at one point in time, maybe the time has changed, maybe you can relive that feeling now, maybe it’s not too late.

Life is too short to worry too much on what the world thinks about you, if you think you are doing the right thing, the world will see it as you radiate it in every aspect of your life. If you doubt yourself, so will the world.


curious on June 18, 2010 at 6:15 AM said...

Great to read but I guess ppl who are close to you never judge you at all. They have already accepted and loved u the way you are. Otherwise they wouldn't be close to you. But those who have fear of being judged they always think that everyone is judging you so their loved ones are also not spared from this criticism.
Sometimes those who are close to you always try to make sure whatever you are doing is in best interest for you or like is safe for you. Being caring and being protective don't necessarily mean that they are judging you at all.

curious on June 18, 2010 at 6:17 AM said...

Great article though. Love how u write it.

Curious on July 19, 2010 at 7:21 PM said...

You are absolutely right, being judged can sometimes be confused with someone being protective of you instead!

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